On September 21st, 1991, I was ordained a deacon. My life since has been especially attached to St. Matthew’s feast day, which occurs exactly on this date every year.
During the ordination ceremony there is a point in which the candidates are called publicly: “Those to be ordained deacons please come forward!” At that voice, after hearing my own name, I stepped forward, and said, as it was in the ritual: “Present!”
The gospel for St. Matthew’s feast also contains a voice. It is Jesus calling a tax collector and in the process transforming him from a publican to an apostle and a saint. “Follow me!” said the Lord, to the astonishment of people around; and to their amazement, Matthew got up, and went with the Prophet of Nazareth. The whole scene remains clear in your eyes, once you have heard the passage, but you can understand how strongly it sticks to your heart when it is the very day you are being called to be ordained.
Prior to that voice, Matthew was not a saint. He was sternly hated almost by everybody–and with good reasons. His life had a clearly marked road ahead: a vicious circle of greed, solitude, profit and self-exclusion. The richer, the more lonely. He gained power and lost his people. You could say he had a large house–or a pretty prison. Perhaps nobody knew it but in the secret of his heart he longed for something he never could afford to pay for… It had been so much time since the last sincere smile knocked at his door!
One day all that had to change. It happened this way. Please, go back with me a few centuries.
There is big excitement all around the place: a prophet, a preacher, a holy man is about to come. The news speak of a gentle yet powerful man, whose word grabs the crowds, whose miracles amaze everybody. He is humble. He is poor. He is wise. There was no doubt the man barely could pay his own taxes; and tax-collecting was Matthew’s business, wasn’t it?
Nonetheless, a tax-collector is more than a tax-collector. Everybody is far more than his o her office or work. Before getting in front of his desk and long after leaving his place, Matthew was always Matthew, the man. However, in public sight, the man had been debunked long ago by the officer. The job had taken over and seemingly there was no room for thinking any more of the person behind the job.
Jesus though found a little crack and peered into the real person, deep inside the character. Jesus saw what no one else had seen. Then Jesus called the man out, all the same as one day he would call Lazarus out of the tomb. And all the same Matthews went out, stood up, and since then followed the kind and powerful voice of his new leader and friend.
Jesus can see my self in a completely new light. His voice can call me in a completely new manner to accomplish a completely different mission.
Dear friends, I trusted in that call back on 1991. I trust Jesus Christ today more than ever. With his grace, I only wish to offer my own voice to his voice, so that many more discover that they are already his. In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.